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Dear Paula Deen, November 13, 2008

Filed under: Day to Day — familydunn @ 2:37 am
Tags: , , , ,

Today you “went bananas” and made all your dishes with bananas. 

Paula Deen, I’ve loved you ever since I saw your affinity for butter and cream cheese.  I appreciate how your definition of cooking is mixing several different forms of cholesterol together and coating them with sugar.  I love that about you, Paula Deen.  But I do not, under any circumstance, want to eat a ham and cheese and bacon and potato chip and BANANA casserole.  What are you thinking?  Have you gone bananas?

Paula Deen, I’ve loved you ever since you were on Elizabethtown.  I thought you did a marvelous job making your jams for Orlando Bloom and it inspired me to daily beg my husband to grow his hair like Orlando’s and ask him to dress up like Legolis during the holidays.  I don’t recall you using bananas during that movie and I now think that was to your own benefit. 

And, Paula Deen, I do not know what constitutes you calling a dish “healthy”, and maybe it’s just me, but just because you add a quarter banana to a pound of butter doesn’t make it healthy.  Also, Paula Deen, when you say “this is a snack you wouldn’t feel bad cooking for your kid after school” I always laugh to myself.  Not because I would feel bad feeding your snacks to my kid after school, but because yeah right, I’m not cooking after school snacks for my kids.  That’s what bananas are for.   

In the great words of the philosopher Stefani, “This sh@# is bananas.  B-A-N-A-N-A-S.”

Love Kristen


2 Responses to “Dear Paula Deen,”

  1. leslie Says:

    Sounds scrumptious. No, really, I’m with you…it’s strange.

  2. Susy Says:

    I totally agree, and I’m laughing at 6:25 in the morning without a full cup of coffee in me! Thank you!!

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